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January 11, 2012

I can't just let it all hang out

Call me modest. Call me raised in a time when only the girls of questionable character bore their bare midriffs. Call me no fun. Call me a prude. I'm sorry, but I just can't walk around the womens' locker room naked.

I would first like to say to those of you who can and do, more power to you. Seriously. If you have no issue walking naked as the day you were born to and from your locker, then back to the mirror, then back to your locker only to sit your unclothed tush right next to my gym bag on the bench, then namasté my exposed gym friend!

But I can't bring myself to just let it all hang out. I think this has less to do with body image (okay, maybe I don't know if my 45-year-old, I've breast fed two babies, lost and gained weight numerous times boobies need to be flapping around in plain view), and more to do with modesty and personal comfort.

For the past four months, I've been trying to figure out an easier way to get ready in the gym post swim. It's always the same. I'm standing at the  mirror, putting on some lotion or drying my hair and kablaam! My towel comes unwrapped and there I am, white, damp and naked as a Botticelli. It never fails. Lift your arm too high with the blow dryer, and fugeddaboutit. You. Are. Now. Naked.

I know I really shouldn't have these issues, but I know I'm not alone. Yes, I appreciate the comfort level some women have with their naked bodies. No, I do not feel compelled to join in. Let's just say there are places other than the gym where I am perfectly at home being naked. (Yes, Dan, I'm referring to our kitchen.)

That said, I found the greatest solution to my issue and all for the low, low price of $14.99.

The Terry Body Wrap Towel.

Hello, modesty!


Oh, you wonderous velcro-sealed garment you! Not only can I easily manuever my way through the locker room without the fear of towel droppage, but I can do so with swagger and confidence. Yes! I can squat down to unlock my locker and remain perfectly G-rated from the back!

It even has a pocket to carry an extra items I might need in my post-workout freshening up.


I know what you're thinking. You could scrapbook in this sucker with a tool pocket like that!

I realize this post has little bearing on the lives of many, but you see I don't usually find cool stuff on the Internet to share with my readers. But this and the fact that it will permanently conceal my Casper-white tushka from the LA Fitness locker room ladies?

It doesn't get any cooler.


When I was reading the first part of your post, before I got to the pictures, I was thinking, "Oh, she just needs one of those velcro towel wrap thingys."

So you go girl.

Go Cathy, I was going to suggest this too LOL
And I am so with you on the maked-ness, do not do it either

This is why I subscribe to your blog Cathy - you totally crack me up! Although I totally agree with you about not wanting to be nekked in public!

I'm heading to the gym in a few minutes...

I think I'll go find a larger towel than I put in this morning...

And go to Target before my next class.

Having spent a LOT of my life in locker rooms - this post was too funny. Being an ex-competitive swimmer (as I know you were), shimming out of a cold, wet bathing suit and getting warm & dry was first priority ... so wrapping was not my first thought. And since I was/am perpetually late, the towel wrap thing was wasted time :).

But I have to laugh because my daughter, an Aquatics professional, needs to walk thru the ladies locker to get to her office (hugh bldg. design flaw). She complains that she sees more naked bodies than a strip club. :)

I also do not like being naked in the locker room, I think it is a comfort thing. Even when I had a model thin body, I still didn't feel like everybody needed to see my business. I love the wrap towels, they are a lifesaver. I love that you took photos of this. I hope to see a scrapbook page soon!

I know how cool it is. I have long hair and HATE to have cold water dripping down my back. Enter the MICROFIBER TURBY TWIST! OH YEAH! (To quote Vector in Despicable Me.)

I start off my work day with you - and I swear, the professor in the office next to me must wonder what I'm laughing about half the time!

It's been one of those mornings, and this totally cracked me up and put it all in perspective.

Oh. And I'm with you. What's with the birthday suit swagger? Are some people just born that way?!?!

Laughing out loud here at crack me up. I totally agree with you and love it!

I love you!!! and I LOVE this post. SO TRUE, and totally agree, well, except for the kitchen part. I always say I am so bad that I would shower WITH my clothes on, if I could!! lol!!!

Ha! That is funny, Rita!

I totally need to order one of those. Two, actually, because my daughter has been begging me for one! I used to have one of those, years ago, when I belonged to a health club -- and I used it for exactly the reasons you mentioned.(Although I don't think mine had the awesome pocket!)I looked for it recently, but have no idea where it went, so I guess it's time for a new one! Thanks for the link! Might actually order myself a new bathrobe while I'm there, too. :-)

I am so happy you wrote this! It is exactly the conversation my bff and I have had. I totally do NOT get it when women do this and it kind of wigs me out. But I come from a modest Cuban family so maybe that's my own issue. And I am not a prude either, there is a time and place to be naked and enjoy it, but I am with you! Now I don't mean changing, etc. but the "prance around/to the shower, etc. naked" has always left me open-mouthed. Hee, hee. :)

Like Mary, above, every morning when I get to work I open your site - and most likely I can relate &/or start the day off w/ a smile. I feel the same way in the locker room! and I'm in Syracuse where we usually have 3 feet of snow right now and don't! and I'm starting my 3rd year of Move More/Eat Well - and also find that challanging (& very rewarding). Thanks, Cathy, for all of your words & wit. You're awesome.

As I started to read I was going to jokingly say, "oh, this post is useless without a photo" ha ha and then BAM there it was! Rock your terry robe proudly. Rock it, CZ!

Funny you should mention naked women in the locker room--I was think that only yesterday. Some of the women in my gym would do well to cover up! I also don't think it very sanitary to sit buck naked on benches that I put my feet on to tie my shoes! I have one of those cover ups and they are the best thing invented for modesty.

You are the best Cathy, love love the way you make me laugh. So happy you found a solution!!!

OH I freaking LOVE YOU Cathy! Ha... This is one of the reasons I do NOT like the gym. I remember having a pass to a gym w/my cousin and how the ladies paraded around as they came into the world and it took all my will power to not have my jaw on the floor and say WHAT IN THE WORLD?! lol.. Needless to say my gym is my home!

Does it come in colors? I think I'd use it for the beach! Yeah, that's right.

That is awesome. I love your enthusiasm about life, weight, weight loss or lack there of, and your family. Everytime I read your blog I smile. And as a former gym go-er I totally understand the need for modesty, Not only do I not want to show my sags and bags I do not feel the need to see anyone elses. Thank you

i am laughing so damn hard right now. fyi- my mom always had those when i was growing up...probably b/c we were always pulling her towel off when she tried to get ready after a shower. hahah!
and forget scrapbooking. i'm thinking a bottle of wine might fit in that pocket. hmmm.

I love the way you tell a story and the "towel droppage" bit cracked me are a funny little vegemite aren't you (that's Aussie of course). I could visualize the story and thought it was so funny. Night night it's now about 5 mins to 1 in the morning and I need my beauty sleep.... Kathy, Brisbane, Australia xxxx

Oh girl! I'm just crying over here! That was just too funny...mostly cuz I can TOTALLY relate to the naked-thing! Of course, when I saw the photo, I thought 2 things: 1) What is she going to do with the ruler in her pocket? and 2)Why didn't she get a customized towel with Move More Eat Well embroidered on it? LOL!

Thanks for lifting the spirits today, Cathy!

THIS is the kind of post I love from you CZ - real life with a hint of humor! Love it -- and I hate the towel droppage too - I use a HUGE hair clip to hold it up - but even that fails me at times - will have to look into the velcro wrap! Thanks for sharing!

According to my hubby, the guys are worse. Some of them actually blow dry their "unmentionables" with one leg up on a bench. I am not kidding.

While reading the first part i was so excited to have the answer to your problems, but when i got to the end i saw you already figured it out. Mine even has shoulder straps because since i was not gifted with any boobies, mine would still fall down if i didn't have the awesome shoulder straps ;o)

I don't use a locker room, but I wouldn't mind having one of those for just around home!
And this post just gave me a good laugh for the day :)

Thanks for the laugh this morning...I loved this post. Even my little girls don't like to be naked in the pool locker room, so I feel your pain : ).

I think the "usual" picture of a terry body wrap is of a svelte, spray tanned, model-ish sort, gracefully holding a hand mirror to examine her perfect made up face and coiffed hair.
I think you sell it better.
Certainly funnier!

Aidan saw mind and went mental. She keeps trying to take it, so, Im getting one for her too!

Yes, that was me delaying the blog gratification. ; )

Yes, you could get one for your next special night with Mr. Jimmy. ; )

oh. my. cant get THAT image ever out of my mind. HAHAHA!

I have to say, Ive been using it at home too, and now Aidan keeps trying to steal it! Back to order another, I suppose!

So funny! I'll never understand the need to walk around completely naked in the locker room. I understand a flash or two. But geez, that's enough. I distinctly remember from my swimming days an older woman who was always naked in the locker room. You would think in a room full of younger girls she would feel the need to cover. Just a little. Nope. It will forever be burned into my brain.

More recently I got a laugh out of woman who, naked, gathered all her shower supplies, put her purse over her, naked, shoulder and walked to the shower, naked, carrying her towel, naked.

Naked is a funny word.

Ok, one should not be reading CZs blog with a full mouth full of water. Then I think I'm ok...but start reading comments and come to Caroline's, and there I go choking again!

I too need one for the locker room, thanks Cathy!

Loved this post. That is how I always feel. During winter, I wear my exercise shorts and then another trouser on top that when I go the gym. To even remove the outer trouser knowing I have my gym shorts on, also makes me pause for a bit!!! So, I totally get it.

You have just saved my life! (Hyperbole, much?) I have been contemplating a swim/workout thing but couldn't wrap my head around what to wear in the locker room between outfits. Was just contemplating a short terry robe (but they are so bulky) when I saw your post!

Yes, I think many an ex-swim team girl has emotional scars. ; )

I love reading your blog! You are hilarious and down to earth and I love that! ALMOST makes me wish I lived in Minnesota so maybe we could be friends - but alas, I will enjoy our "friendship" from the warmth of my Arizona home!
I, too, agree that naked in the gym locker room is not for me. I am absolutely buying myself a Terry velcro wrap. Thanks for the tip!

Last year for Christmas my crafty mom made me not only one of the velcro towel wraps but one of those fancy hair wrap gadgets as well. Not only can I move without worrying about becoming naked in front of everyone but I can bend over without worrying about my hair cascading everywhere! Ingenious! Every woman should have a set!

ya i never got the running around naked in the locker room thing. Reminds me of the first scene in the movie Carrie lol.

oh my...I lived in the cousin would desperately try to suspend her towel between two locker doors so no one would "see" her...I just didn't have those genes... that's not to say I have the "strutting genes" either! Thanks for the laugh Cathy:o)

Oh, Cathy thank you for expressing what I have been feeling. I am always amazed at some of the women in the locker room and what they "share" with the rest of us.

I had no idea these existed and I'm buying one ASAP. I too lack the "strutting genes" and have had similar problems with my giant beach towel coming undone even when I thought I tucked it tight. *The horror* I'm quite sure it is only my horror, because no one ever seems to notice. They are too busy doing their strutting and sometimes even without shower shoes!

HOLY ??????? SERIOUSLY!!!! bwahahahaha....

THIS has to be my favorite post EVER!!! I can't quit laughing....I even walked away to rotate the laundry and found myself still giggling about it!!!LOL I do need to say...don't EVER sit your bare bottom on the bare bench......EEWWWW!!! You just have no idea what's been there before the delicate skin of your posterior!! ;)

Oh, Cathy. You make me laugh. :)

He he he! I was totally thinking you needed a velcro towel as I started reading. I have an older one I picked up at Costco that has thin shoulder straps as well as velcro and I love it! Such a pratical item to keep in your gym bag.

I am not a "show it all" kind of girl at the gym either. I was grossed out by the bare bum on the bench gross is that? But, I understand and I am in complete agreement with not letting it all hang out.

I have one of these velcro towel jobbies, but it has shoulder straps for added convenience! It is a Tommy Hilfiger one that I bought way back when I was first teaching aerobics and showered at the gym. Comes in real handy! :) I especially loved the pocket for my mini shampoos and hairbrush! You made me laugh with the ruler in the pocket though....such a scrapbooker you are! Thanks for the giggle!

When I read your comment, I turned to my husband and asked him and without blinking he said "Oh yeah!"! I asked him if he did that and he said .... of course not!

I completely agree! I don't want to show it and I don't want to see it. Enough said.

I need one for my teenage grandson (he's lived with us since he was a baby). Well, he walks around in his towel and sometimes he has "towel droppage" and he says, "G-ma don't look!" I just sigh and go on.

Thanks for the laughs for the whole family today!

I never know where to look when I am talking to a naked gym friend. And...why dry your hair in front a mirror with it all hanging out? WHY???? Is it REALLY that much work to put a bra on? And don't get dressed in the space for washing hands and drying hair, go get dressed BY THE LOCKERS, you know where you keep your clothes. And, please...please refrain from drying your hoo-hoo with the hair dryer. please?

I'm cracking up reading your post. You are hilarious. On a serios note love that wrap!

Hm, my comment disappeared apparently. If I post twice, my apologies. Cathy, as I started reading this post, I immediately thought of this hilarious video of British comedian Michael McIntyre: He would love a wrap, I guess. :-)

Funny guy!

Haven't checked out Edith's link but know exactly which sketch she is talking about!
I have to thank you Cathy Zielske for this public service announcement. I too had not been aware of this marvellous invention and when not in use I can see one taking pride of place beside the OCD chopping board that you also pointed us to and which has revolutionised our julienned carrots.

this post is AWESOME!! Made me laugh...I know how you feel...I may need to get myself a wrap!!

Seriously, when I was in high school gym class in the seventies, all the showers were in an open area (no curtains!!) so we were all required to get around naked. I HATED it so much that I'm truly glad my children and grandchildren don't have to do that anymore. Talk about body image issues we all developed later!

so funny and SO TRUE. Im not a naked at the pool kind of a gal and as i taught at our local school for 10 years before having my own children i always now have an issue with taking the kids swimming, getting them dry and clothed and then try and get myself dry and sorted quickly before someone calls out "hi miss small" while i'm half exposed! ( it has happened!)

oh the joys :> julie

I seriously just about wet my pants reading this. So true - I so do not need anyone to see my lunch break booty shake as I walk to and from the shower.I am gettin me one of those rockin towels!

When I read the title of your post today... it reminded me of an email I received from a friend yesterday.

Dyson may be on to something...;)

so funny, so true. tena

O...M...G!!! I'm laughing even harder at that than Cathy's post!!

LOL!! So love that I live right across the street from my gym and can go home to shower before I going to my office or elsewhere anywhere else. But I completely understand what you are saying...I also have never been comfortabl exposing my bare self in a locker room. And even if I looked like a supermodel, I still wouldn't do that.

hysterical! makes me glad when i go swimming at the ymca it is always with the kids so i can use the family locker room - with individual changing rooms with doors. only risk there is that if one of my kids opens the door when i'm not dressed yet, it might be some other kids DAD who sees me...

Thanks for the laugh... Especially the kitchen comment.

Very funny story. I had one of those in college in the early 1980s since the showers were down the hall. Loved it.

LOL here, Cathy!
Now I want one of those... too bad they don't ship to Brazil :(

I think I could have gone the rest of my lifetime without that image in my mind...(still laughing)

Thank you for the laugh. It was a much needed gaffaw!

Awesome! I'm not a naked gym walker and the after pool situation is not my favorite. I definitely need to get one of those.

You make me smile but I do so agree, naked and lockroom should not be used in the same sentence! I have friend who always says "if you've got it, flaunt it" and I say to her "Yes but just not in my face"!!

Oh, the painful memories you stirred in me of the days in high school gym and the group shower room :-( Ugh! I was forced to disrobe after class, take a quick shower, then wrap up :-( Oh how I hated it! Torture three days a week!
And besides that, we had to prance by our gym teacher to show we were actually wet!! Couldn't that be construed as sexual harassment these days? I hope girls have a choice as to whether they want to shower after class or not nowadays. Our teacher put a check mark in her grade book if we were "wet enough". :-(
Well, my problem was my own mind, I suppose -- I hated my body (still do). The girls who actually owned nice bods seemed to be the ones who had no problem with their nakedidity.

Good idea, but that velcro is nasty if undone and will pull & shred everything in its path~ including ALL brand new robes & towels. Be sure to keep it locked tight. I ended up taking it off ~ well actually, pulling it off while swearing!
Good idea for the gym though!

This is super funny! i was cracking up reading this. It's something I'd get excited about... LOL a towell!

Thank you for noticing that. My hubby said, Um when are you naked in the kitchen again? I say, Oh babe, its for EFFECT!

YAY for modesty! And a big YAY for the pockets on that thing....that is awesome. :)

Cathy, I feel the same way about the towel droppage -- even in my own house. Because I've got 2 little boys that refuse to knock as well as a bad habit of not closing doors. I'm glad you found a bit piece of happy - it's all about the little things, isn't it? :D

Having been born to a 19-yr old Gidget, and a 24-yr old surfer boy, I was raised on the local nude beach. (The best waves were there...something about the cove and the way the water comes in...) I sometimes have to remind myself that not everybody 'gets' nakedness. I never give it a second thought. Thanks for the chuckle.

You crack me up! I've never been comfortable with the whole naked locker room bit either.
Try watching the show "How to Look Good Naked", kinda gave me a new perspective. Don't worry I'm not considering a wardrobe of trenchcoats only from now on! LOL!

I tried to leave a comment yesterday and I don't see it...hmmm...another one bites the dust in the big ole blogosphere ;} Anyhow...I totally get your "issues" and especially after working 8 years in a gym environment...even though I was corporate at times we were in the gyms and had to use the facilities. Needless to say I was so tired of the free could always tell which girls had fake boobs...they were the ones to flaunt them all the more...boring!
I've had one of these towels for years...but mine came from being in a home with four boys/men running around. One of our homes had the masterbath separate from the closet so I had to trek across the masterbedroom to find my clothes half the time...I'm not one to know what I want to wear or how I'm gonna feel when I get out of the shower ;} So after a few awkward moments of the boys bounding into my bedroom...believing that I was still in the bathroom...enough said! I got one of these for mother's day one year...still have it and had it monogramed...a big "C" with loads of flowers around it will stop your boys from grabbing the wrong towel ;}

I guess I always forget about all of the, ahem, plastic in the locker rooms! I will never alter my body, but if I had stand up fake boobs, i would still not want to be naked! LOL!

I'm with you for sure...that's because we were raised right and proper Sista ;}

Oh how I love you CZ! When I lived in TN, I often ran into a friend/work acquaintance at the gym. She was a free as a bird type, which I suppose is okay, but she also wanted to TALK in the locker room. I'm sorry but I simply cannot have a conversation with someone when they have no clothes on! It's just weird!!

Oh I love it!!! I'm telling my mom about it so she can try it out after her H2O class. I've also used my old diving mumu. Super huge, super warm...& hides a multitude of old body parts that should not be shown in public! Thanks for the laugh Cathy!

Oh my! I'm still laughing. This was a truly happy post. When I use to go to the gym I would think the same things. Thanks for the giggle.

'Nuff said.

Oh Cathy - that made me smile :-) What a great solution and with the tool pocket as well? Fantastic!!! You will not only look modest but smart too ;-)

OMG!!I can't stop laughing, are so funny.This is my first time reading you blog and I am now hooked,so funny

You. Are. HILARIOUS!!! Thanks for the afternoon giggle.

Oh fun! Hope youll come back!

Hilarious! I will never get the whole prancing around the locker room naked, thing, either. It is just so bizarre to me. If we were all in, say, the grocery store it would be a little weird...but once we are in the locker room it is totally normal for one to whip out ones al...and walk around all nonchalant? I don't know. Just can't wrap my head around that. So, I'm getting one of those wraps to go around me, instead!

I have to admit, I came back and reread this post for the picture. Now I realize you are giving a thumbs up! I thought you were grabbing a boob, and I wondered if I missed something. I increased the size of your posts on my monitor... won't happen again!

oh gee thanks for the image. I think it's going to stick around longer than earworms do!

; P

No way! Really??
Now I'm disappointed. You had me thinking you're the adventurous amorous type, taking immediate advantage of kids gone.

; P

Now seriously - on what type of blog would this post fit in as 'just another typical post'????

Thank you for the laughter.
In addition to the velcro-attacks-world warning - another one: velcro CAN r-i-p itself apart if the towel is tight and you move the wrong way. BTDT.

You can easily make something similar - just get a good sized towel and sew elastic around top edge.

Now that is an image seared forever on my retinas, thank you veddy much !

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