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September 25, 2012

Two years ago, right now (another lurid tale from the scale)

Twoyearsago

This is not going to be a woe-is-me, what-the-hell-happened kind of blog post. In case you're wondering. Nope. Not going to go there.

Okay, maybe just a tiny bit.

I was going through my iPhoto library over the weekend, looking for some specific shots for a project and came across a series of photos of me in my hallway mirror in October 2010, and I remembered what it felt like to have a new skirt, new boots and a new waistline to match.

This was me at 141 pounds, after losing 41 extra libbies. This was me after 10 months of religious adherence to the Weight Watchers plan. This was me, thinking, "Oh yeah, baby. NOW life begins!"

I so got this.

Of course, I did not 'so got that'. Not really. Not at all, some might have said.

So began the past two years of slowly moving back up the BMI chart. When I started teaching Move More, Eat Well, I was very inspired at the idea of making changes that would stick. When that class began, I had worked my way up to around 160, and I was hell bent on getting back to where I'd once landed.

It didn't quite work out that way.

One of the positives of the past two years, however, is a commitment to getting my move on. Whether it's been running, walking, swimming, biking, or hanging out with Jillian Michaels in my family room, I've made the effort to Move More whenever possible. And I've realized that even if it isn't the magic key to weight loss, it is a key to a clearer mind and a calmer heart.

The summer, specifically August, saw a huge drop off in my exercise habits. I could make some tepid excuses about bone spurs and foot pain, but as I have learned, there are always other things you can do. I just got sloppy.

And if I get sloppy in moving my body, the food component—or rather, the crappy food component—catches up in a big way. And fast.

In my class this year, it has been all about keeping it real and not giving up. Even when you feel defeated. Even when you start to think, as I have, "Oh, shit. Here we go again."

As I sit here typing, following a 3.5 mile run where things didn't really hurt all that bad, glowing red like a freshly cooked lobster, I still believe that I have the capability of living a healthy, fit life. That I can figure out this insane sugar habit I seem to have picked up in my life. That I can be the changes I truly want to see.

I mean, hells bells, I quit smoking. I think that qualifies me to do just about anything.

Me

So I'm puffy right now. So I'm not doing what I know how to do. 

There's really no need to mope about now is there? Every day is a whole new ball game.

The possibilities are actually pretty endless.

That's where my head is today.

How about you?

Comments

Am I a tiny bit jealous? Yes, yes I am. Look at all those gorgeous papers in the background!!!! But hey, focussing on what's important - you look fabulous. Go you. :)

every day is a fresh start and we do learn from where we've been where we are going. I know now when I feel "puffy" WHY I do and it's a reminder of whose hand the fork is in. I've obviously made that decision and have to deal with the result - one way or another - and have to decide how I'm going to deal with it.

I am right there with you sistuh! So. right. there! I get so sick of this up and down, thinking I have it down and I slowly inch my way back up the scale. The last 5 months have seen me totally disgusted with myself and yet unable to *want* to make a change. what is wrong with me...sigh. thanks for keeping it real Cathy!

Agreed. I lost 30lbs a couple of years ago and have maintained that. Problem is, I need to lose another 70. I have purposely chosen to focus on the fact that a) I lost the 30lbs and b) I've kept it off.

I knew that I had to this in a way that works with MY brain. Too much deprivation in one direction or another is a big 'ol path for me to failure. I simply can't "do" diet food. I need real food. So, I have to figure out how to eat in ways that keep me from getting heavier. And of course, I've got to add more movement to my life. Both things I'm working on. It didn't take me a week to gain this wait. It's going to take an equal amount of time to get off...and then some, I'm sure.

On Sunday, I downloaded the "Lose It!" app on the recommendation of a friend. Its hard to ignore the facts when it's there in black and white. And guess what? I'm not doing too bad. Yeah me! I think I'm ready to push forward some more. I'm not trying to lose all 70lbs. 50 is my goal. The app tells me at 1/2lb a week, it's going to take me a year. And that's okay.

You're beautiful and you have awesome hair! No moping needed!!

Oh how I wish I could edit. Holy grammar mistakes Batman!

whooo hooo! I'm there too. Are you going to do the October Whole 30 thing?

I think you look awesome!

I think you look terrific and from your blog, it sounds like the changes you've been making in your life have more than made up for you "feeling puffy" (cause you don't look it)!

I think it is all about being connected to what is really going on. I am not a deer in the headlights here, you know? Its all about deciding how to deal with it!

Joanne, nothing is wrong. Its just about choices and consequences, right? Both negative and positive. Nothing is wrong with you at all! : )

Aw, thanks.

Good for you, Joy. But keeping 30 off IS an accomplishment, no matter how you slice it. I use the Lose It app when Im in the mindset of wanting to know how much I eat. : ) Im definitely trying to get info from other sources too. WHAT i eat, is also really important. : ) Keep up the good work.

I was a sugar addict. Google 'Dukan Diet'. Have a read.
It may help. It did me.
Lost my excesses :). Best wishes.

We are harder on ourselves. I think you look great!

Me ... not so much. Yeah. Summer sucks. The excuses to skip exercise and consume beer instead are limitless!! I, too, am puffy.

But I'm fresh (well, not really but go with it) back from a 4 mile bike ride and eating a healthy lunch as I type (so what if it's 11:30 a.m.! Baby steps people! :) )

I did this drastic measure and it has been helping tremendously:

After creeping up the scale slowly but significantly, I went through my closet and took every single thing that didn't fit (that is didn't fit correctly, even if i could pull them up and button them) and put it in a pile. I then separated it into smaller piles based on how much I needed to weigh in order to wear it again. Then I bagged those piles in the massive clear ziploc storage bags and wrote in big sharpie on the bag the weight number. Then I put them in the top of our garage in order front to back. It was SO SAD to see all my beautiful clothes in garbage bags way up in the yucky garage. My closet was even more sad. Huge walk-in closet. 20 items hanging that actually fit. Talk about motivation! I wanted those clothes back! When I would go in the garage, I would see that front-most bag in the loft, the clothes in it through the clear plastic, and that big number.

Every time I hit one of those milestones on the scale, I purge all my clothes that are "comfy" and "safe" and rip one of those bags open. It is the most awesome feeling and really keeps me going!

I think we ALL go there. Summertime always puts a slump in my "moving more". (Actually I'm moving more, just not in the right ways. lol)

Since I started exercising back in 2009, I've been through many cycles and I'm learning to just let things go as they will. Life happens. I do what I can, but I'll never beat myself up over only running (or walking) a mile, or only being able to do the intermediate level of a workout. It's ALL good.

. . . And you are still fabulous! ;) You'll find your groove again. This crap isn't easy, but it's worth every moment.

Ultimate goal = NO BAGS in the garage AT ALL! :)

I have a lot of food, exercise and health knowledge at 46 years old, but I have not figured out how to put it all together in a balanced and successful way. I'm usually doing great with one aspect or another, but if I try to "do it all" the way I think I should, there's usually a crash and burn situation. Being a mom, wife, solo-entrepreneur, home manager and perimenopausal may be the reasons that this one thing in my life doesn't work. I just need to keep trying and celebrate the smaller successes.

Love those boots, btw. Frye's?

To quote Mary Pickford and as evidenced by your strength in persevering, “If you have made mistakes, even serious mistakes, you may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down.”
― Mary Pickford

Way to go, Cathy, in choosing not to stay down, but to pick yourself up and to try again. Cheering you on!

I read your post while eating a leafy green salad. My second day of trying to gain control over my eating and health. The whole process of eating well and moving more is a challenge. And in keeping with being real I'll admit I am a Move More/Eat Well dropout. I loved the class, loved the ideas and inspiration. I watched month after month as others achieved success while I kept eating the junk and not exercising and didn't lose. I get that I'm in control. My head gets it. I just don't act on it and then I feel guilty, ashamed and mad with myself. Time to reframe and remember the possibilities are endless...thank you for your post.

Reframe indeed! : ) I hope youll join me next year. Even though I will admit, theres a part of me that is thinking, Um yeah, Cathy, if you arent making it happen, how can you inspire others? but i think many of us share this whole challenge. Its all about showing up eventually, you know? : ) Anything is possible.

Nice method! I do love hearing how others get a kick of motivation. Good for you!

Someone was just talking about this. Might have to read up. : )

This morning the scale said I have lost 40 pounds so far. For 3 weeks I was at the 39 pound mark, so maybe it is finally moving again. I use the Lose It app, too, just to remind me of portion control. I started out the year just trying to eat healthier and cut out gluten. That was such a big deal for me because I love my bread. I have not completely cut out gluten, but have cut way back on it and have certainly been eating healthier and more realistic size portions. As for moving more - I am making even slower progress. I understand about the excuses, but sometimes maybe those excuses are a little valid. I'm afraid I will never be very active - just too many health problems - but I am trying to do a little more every day. What I know for sure is I wouldn't be this far if it wasn't for you, Cathy! Thanks.

Blow this picture up like refridge size and put it there or on the wall of your closet, back of bathroom door...somewhere. Motivation.

I've finally realized (at 49) that my hormones are playing a huge role in all this rollercoaster weight stuff. I've finally clued in that I reach for carbs and red wine when I get this tsunami roar of anxiety -- I didn't even realize that was what was going on. So I'm going to get a doc to help me with that. This menopause business is rough. Doesn't make the existing weight issues (a battle my whole life) one bit easier. It's inspiring and refreshing to read your take on this and think okay, here I am, endless possibilities in front of me. Thanks for sharing your journey.

Purging the "comfy" and frumpy clothes is key! All my clothes fit nicely and if, after a wine and salt-laden weekend, something feels a bit more snug on Monday, I snap back into shape during the week because guess what? There is nothing bigger in the closet to fall back on! That's all I've got!

Jan, thats so dang cool! Good for you. : ) Seriously.

Well, one of the ways that Ive been sabotaging is definitely red wine. Thats a whole new thing, as of last May, when I decided I liked a glass or two with dinner. And its essentially carbs in a glass. Choices. Thats what it boils down to. I need to remember my pre-wine days. : ) But the hormones too. Im trying to learn how to balance them better.

I went to Zumba today (my exercise drug of choice, if you will), and before I went, I thought, awww, do I really have to go today? What if I stayed home and did (insert any number of a bazillion other things I could be doing) instead? Guess what? I went. I sweated. A LOT. And I felt SO. MUCH. BETTER. I don't win this battle every day. Sometimes I cave and skip it. But, I'll tell ya this, I feel a thousand percent better on the days I don't skip it than on the days I do. Keep on keeping on.

All I can say is that I understand, I empathize and I sympathize. Moving into a new arena of therapy, I really don't care if the world reads this, with a new therapist who is calling me to task and perhaps for the first time I am seeing the truth.

Getting clutter out of head and house is a huge struggle and commitment. I hate it and I am having days of kicking and screaming. No alcohol does help.

Found a pair of jeans I wore 6 years ago after having lost a total of 250 lbs. Yes, you heard right. That wasn't skinny by any means but I felt good, I exercised and I felt like I had life back after many years of hellish living. No need for details, we probably can tell similiar stories with a bit different details. Now I find myself 110 lbs above my lowest weight. Yes, we can all say but look how much you are still down!!! Doesn't matter. With chronic pain and other "stuff" at the ripe age of almost 61, it feels nearly as bad as my highest weight. People just don't make as much fun to my face.

Let us all carry on, let me stop making those excuses and wallowing in other addictions/habits that distract us from the truth and where we need to go.

This is a speech for me and maybe a little encouragement/call to action for someone else. Please hang with me. It gets harder by the year but I want to feel good again. I just want to get into life again and not feel like totally worthless. And I want to wear those size 14 jeans again which felt like a size 6 does to many of you ;).

Thanks to Linda, my new therapist. Thanks to all of you here and in the group.

From a lurker, for the most part.

I'm in a similar headspace. I can make all the excuses I want about how this year wasn't my best, but the last week or so I've been feeling more like my old self than I have in a long time, with my old outlook, and that I can still turn this year around with a hail mary in the fourth. :) I'm tired of doing the bare minimum in all aspects of my life. I will never be satisfied until I do MORE.

Hi Cathy, I stumbled upon your blog a few months ago and have been reading regularly, but rarely comment.
I love how honest you are about this journey. You saying that moving more is a "key to a clearer mind and a calmer heart" really resonates with me. I, too, am trying to move more and eat well to be better as a whole person. Life is full of lessons if we look closely. I appreciate your honesty and insight.

i am interested in this too. I have looked at the Whole 30 several times, but looks really tough. Might be good to break a sugar addition though (of which I have one too).

Boots are very MOD London, very Bee-oools.
Look, Mates, we're Recooooooording.

Almost without fail, I feel better about everything after I exercise.

I struggle, too with keeping it going.
My inspirations:
1. I saw on pinterest one time: "it takes 4 weeks for you to notice your body changing, 8 weeks for your friends, and 12 weeks for the rest of the world. Give it 12 weeks. Don't quit." which i need because I in- accurately expect to see immediate results!
2. Tosca Reno who transformed herself using the Eat Clean diet and workout, and at age 53 is entering a bodybuilding contest!! it CAN be done, even in middle-age
3. A newspaper clipping my folks sent me recently from the town where I grew up: it was a photo of my first boyfriend, and he's gotten quite large and I am determined this is NOT going to happen to me!

nevah nevah nevah give up!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for sharing, Bec. : ) I have a therapist who is calling me to task on this, and every area of my life. The great thing about humans? Our potential to change and grow.

We are planning to give it a shot in my Move More, Eat Well class. Not mandatory, but we are going to issue the challenge in class. Im going to give it a try. Starting on Oct. 2, though, as Ive got a dinner plan for the 1st that cant be changed. : )

You are priceless, you little imp.

Glad you found me here. Happy you are coming back to read. : )

I almost never leave a comment on a blog but now i just had to. This is not a 'poor me' story, but just to let you know that it's not all that important. At least not from my point of view. Look at you! Gorgeous hair(I have none!), beautiful glowing skin, your eyes are so full of life!
You must be so grateful, what you are kvetching about is only on the outside, the way you think you look! To me, just by looking at your pic I see a woman full of life, ready for anything that comes on her path. Girl you just ran 3.5 mile! You are healthy right? You have this brilliant, awesome life with exciting work and you're healthy, no nasty illnesses attacking you this moment, you're free to go and do as you please, leave your house, drive your car, go places, meet friends, have meaningful conversations. Your healthy! You are so so rich! Health is wealth. Why am I so obsessed with health? Because I lost it. An illness that causes inflammation and infection in the spinal cord and brain took it, I'm 95% of the day house and bed bound and in severe pain 24/7. My goal for this year is to walk to the end if my drive way. If I can make that than who knows, anything is possible!
Every day I'm reminded of how rich I was when I still had my health. Focus on what's really important, you got the greatest gift of all, your health. Thanks for listening:-)

Christine, thanks for sharing this, and yes, you are right. I have health and that is an absolute gift. Im actually writing about gratitude for a class project. This comment is a very focusing moment for me. : )

In response to Christine and Cathy - Perspective is so important. My sister-in-law was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. Now after surgery she is waiting to find out what kind of treatment she will be having. I am not dealing with anything in my life that is life-threatening, so life is good. Problems, frustrations, irritations? Heck yes. I have my health (even though my body is aching after going to the gym for the first time in 20 something years!). You know the saying that is something like: Be nice because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.

My name is Tracy. I am a sugar addict. They say sugar is more addictive than heroin. There is no such thing as consuming it in moderation for me. One cookie turns into the entire batch. Last December I realized how sugar was running and ruining my life and my otherwise healthy lifestyle. Cold turkey, I stripped sugar from my diet and started a whole foods approach to eating, eliminating processed crap " food". The first 10 days of " detox" we're tough, but since then,I no longer CRAAVE the evil that is sugar wondering when and how I can get my next " fix". You are a strong, beautiful and healthy woman. Just know that I am a happier and healthier woman now that sugar no longer controls me. All the best to you, CZECH!

Darn that spell check! Sorry CZ!!! :)

You look wandahful, dahling!!! Seriously, you look great and that is definitely something! Stay well, Cathy!

Are you doing this class again in 2013?

I really want to see what going off sugar, in all forms, feels like. Thats my plan.

Indeed I am. Itll keep me accountable, and anyone who wants to join in!

i always say that it is worst than a drug or alcohol addiction because they cant cut that out and not be around it. for us it is forever. forever the battle. we have to live with food everyday. thank you for your words always.

I just love how you always keep it so real. I am a MMEW participant but have never posted in the gallery because I have not been happy with results. It is a process and sometimes a very sloooooow process. I have degenerative arthritis in both knees - bone on bone - movement is painful a lot if not all of the time but I am too young for knee replacement so says my doctors. I still keep trying and striving for moving more. I have also come across the Whole 30 and the ideas that it shares for a lifetime change. So far it is really feeling good! Giving me hope once more for a better, healthier life. I am a migraine sufferer. Since I have been following many of the guidelines in Whole 30 I have not had a single migraine! YEA! More motivation to keep it going!
I have to say I second what Tina J. said...You are beautiful and I love your awesome hair!
Keep up the great work!

Hey Cathy and everyone else who is doing what we're doing...trying to be healthy..you are doing great. Glad you keep reevaluating and regrouping, setting goals and moving forward.
My only advice comes from success this year with 33 pounds being gone and countless inches being lost when I've struggled for YEARS before...basically move more, eat enough good stuff to support your activity level, and lift more.

Move more is various cardio items. You are good at moving. Keep at it.

Eat enough good stuff....that means whole foods. Real foods. Protein protein protein. Veges, Eggs, limited whole grains and fruits, and get rid of the sugar and sugar substitutes. I follow a mostly primal/paleo guide. Every meal (almost 5 a day) is centered around 30ish grams of protein. Add a vege and it's done. Avocados, nuts, coconut oil, olive oil. Lots of water.

Mostly, figure out your BMR and your daily calorie needs based on activity level and eat those calories in good, whole foods. You'll be eating so much you won't ever be hungry. If you are, eat more good food, even if you are over your calories for the day.

So many of us have screwed up our metabolisms to the point of starvation, usually with the blessing of our doctors who tell us to eat 1000-1200 calories a day...it doesn't work!!!!. You cannot loose weight permanently by following low calorie diets, especially if you are active at all. You have to feed the furnace. Once the metabolic fire gets going, its really hard to stop it. There is no glory in skipping lunch...

You have to eat enough food to support your activity. Bottom line is 80% of body composition is what you put in your mouth. (no research there, just run of the mill experience). When my activity falls off for whatever reason, I make up for it in wise choices nutritionally. Except wine. It isn't a wise choice for me to give up wine. That would be plain crazy.

Finally, lift. Lift heavy. Heavy is relative. Go to the boys side of the gym. Usually the scenery is nice. Get a trainer to show you proper form and do compound lifts like bench presses, overhead presses, rows, squats, dead lifts, lunges. You can't bench press or lift the 45# olympic bar, that's ok, there's smaller, often preloaded bars or dumbbell weights to help you build strength...just leave the pretty pastel 2# dumbbell on the daycare center floor. When the old school power lifter dudes know you by your first name and share their squat racks with you...that's a feeling of accomplishment.
;-)

The more muscle you build, the less lean muscle you lose while eating at a deficit. You will not get bulky...you will preserve lean muscle mass while losing fat. Muscle takes up less space than fat but we tend to waste away our lean muscle when we diet. We think a pound is a pound on the scale...well not true. I am 2-3 sizes smaller at my current weight than I was the last time I was at this weight 10 years ago. Lift weights and your body will become more shapely and the inches will fall off of you.

I'm at the point in my journey where I have lost enough that people are asking how I did it. It's 80% what I shove in my mouth and 80% patience, hard work and persistence. Yes...that's 160%...

Onward...20# pounds (or 2 more sizes) to go.

My apologies for the length of my post....I just got on a roll with it.

OK I have to say it. Crap (did I just swear on Cathy's blog?!?!) ah yeah - Crap, you are gorgeous!!

I think the present you is beautiful. I have done the yo-yo thing myself....more than I would like to admit. We are human. We are enough. We need to be better to ourselves. Your post today was just that, being ok with you. I needed to read that so I can apply it to myself. Thanks.

Chris, I love everything you say. Im wanting to lift and have been for a while (well, wanting is a loose term, but you know what im saying.) Thanks for your post here!

thank you. very kind of you to say.

Sugar is a beast. One that I too am addicted too. I fully believe it is as bad if not worse than drugs. It does things to your body. I spent years eating a ton of it with no ill affects or real weight gain so I never thought about it till it was too late. Unfortuantely some of us will always struggle with the whole exercise, weight, eat healthy thing I suppose. We all have battles and I guess this will now just be one of mine and sounds like yours. However it is a battle I will not give up on even if I have to fight every day as I believe it is an important one. I unfortuately am a very picky eater and suffer from chronic migraines so that makes my battle even more of an adventure LOL

Thanks Cathy...the iron really is the key and when you decide to go for it, you will be soooooo pleased at the results.

I think you look beautiful. You have great skin, and I'm crushing on your shiny yet subtle pink lips.

I love reading your blog. I think every person is different and has to figure out what works for them. I've tried many things over the past years to shed any amount of weight. I've had some success only to fall off the wagon and gain it all back.

Spring break this year, we had scheduled a vacation with friends from church. Yikes - how could I go on the beach with all this fat and in a swimsuit in front of friends??!! In January, I joined the gym and hired a trainer. After all, if I was sick, I would go to a doctor so why not get professional help. I was able to lose 20 lbs before vacation. Since then, I've lost 15 more. I get stuck but I try to remember how far I have come. I try to not beat myself up - not an easy task as my plan was to have lost 80 lbs by November.

Even though I'm a long way off, I now have the tools to do it. However, I've gained so much more than weight loss. I can now do so much more than I could before. I've gained muscle and tasks such as raking, tree trimming, mopping on my hands and knees, and a various other household tasks are so much easier. I am grateful for my newly shaped body - even if it is a long way off from where I want to be.

Cathy, you have inspired so many people! I appreciate your honesty. Too often people only write about successes. I (as well as many of your readers) can totally relate to your blogs! Keep up the good work.

Have you read the book "Younger Next Year for Women" by Chris Crowley and Henry S. Lodge M.D.??? I thought of you while I was reading it. A girlfriend in book club insisted I read it & now all of us are taking turns reading it!

Thanks. And thank Aveda lip gloss for that one. ; )

I have not heard of it, but now, thanks you you, I may have to check it out!

Jun2009-Aug2011- lost 110 lbs with only 30 to go to the dream me. Then job issues, new job, best friend loses mother, best friends husband leaves her, teenage son has teenage issues, husband gets laid off........you know, LIFE. 30 lbs back on. I was feeling pretty crappy about myself then my husband reminded me of where I started and how I was there for those who needed me and how lucky he felt to have me for his wife. So that is what I am doing. Re-grouping, shutting up the negative inner voice and being grateful for the wonderful life I have. And grateful everyone is in or close to a much better place. Thanks for your honesty.

Oh Man, I wish we could be work out buddies! I quit smoking in February, I was working out a couple times a week, and I cut a bunch of crap from my diet.

Well.....I kept up the 'no crap' diet, but.....I fell off the smoke free and exercise wagon. Partly because of a lot of stress and a bew job, but really-you are SO right when you say there are always excuses.

I am trying to go one day at a time, but I keep waiting for the super boost-that kick in the butt that will get me all jazzed up to exercise again.

Thanks so much for your blog, I really love reading it.

Any chance you want to fly out to KY for a run or a hike?? lol

So enjoy your posts...so love that you continually keep it real...wondering though about your second self portrait. How have you edited/sharpened your image to make it look so axing on your blog. I am so struggling with posting crystal cLear photos. Yours look fabulous!!

Cathy....I just want to thank you for keeping it real, because honestly this journey is not an easy one nor one that we can just simply cross off a "to-do" list. It's a discipline and a mindset...and yes sometimes we stumble and fall, but it's what we do after we stumble that counts.

I just first of all have to thank you for inspiring me 2 years ago. It is because of you that I have lost weight, but more than that, helped me find a new passion and get healthy. I am in my second year of running and let me tell you, I still have days that I dread putting on my shoes, but after I do it I am so glad that I pushed through and did it. Right now I am 50 miles away from reaching the purple level on Nike+ and I honestly owe it to you for motivating me.

For me I find that I HAVE to have something to motivate me...in the beginning it was you and the Nike+ challenges...when they did away with the challenges I was sort of in a slump...until a young lady at my church challenged me to a half-marathon next summer...instant motivation for me! Right now I'm using the 21K runner app and though there are some runs that I swear I am going to literally die I push through somehow because I am competitive that way I guess. And now my running has motivated a couple other lady friends of mine to take up running with me....so your inspiration is definitely having a trickle effect.

No matter what Cathy, despite drawbacks and bad days, the fact that we just get out there and do something, the fact that we decide to eat those almonds instead of a hot fudge sundae...sometimes we just need to just celebrate those baby little steps and not be so hard on ourselves. You are doing great...and know that others are improving their lives because of you!! Hugs and love girl!!

We started at about the same place, got down to about the same place, and are at about the same place now. I hate that the cool, skinnier pants I got HURT if I can get them zipped for work.... My friend forwarded this post to me today because I am sooooo mad that I have made poor choices and put weight back on that I thought for sure was gone for good..... I was feeling just down and icky about my stupidity. Thank you for ALWAYS being real and making me feel like I am not alone. (I had signed up for your year long class & never opened a link all summer I have been so frustrated, humbled & embarrassed to be so off track.) Ugh. At least I am not alone. Thank you for perspective. I needed it.
Kristi (used to work at Cropper Hopper)

What's the October Whole 30??? And you know, you really are beautiful inside and out!

I love when you do these blogs and everyone has such honest and open comments. Just as you class is set up. I think the accountability of having a group of people working together and checking on on each other can make such a big difference. To know that others are on the same journey, that we all have bad days, that it's possible to start fresh tomorrow. We all need support on our side. I found great success with home videos, clean eating, and a support group. It makes a difference. I also found what I think is the greatest shake (all natural) that I drink once a day and it REALLY helps keep my cravings down.

I found sugar was increasing my anxiety big time. I have cut it back drastically and with a few changes to my mindset, im having fewer anxiety attacks. I still have sugar in some foods but i know if i have a milo (in australia, its like a hot chocolate) before bed then the next morning im sluggish feel *off* and a bit yuck in the tummy. So cutting back has definately helped me.

My advice Cathy is keep on swimming:) you will either get there, or be at a place you are happy at and it will all come together:) Good luckxx

Strength training is awesome:) Have you heard of Les Mills Body Pump Classes? Im not sure if they are worldwide but you lift weights to tracks of music. Great workout!

Wow! Cathy you inspired me over a year ago. I was doing great (lost 27 pounds) and then BAM life threw me several curve balls. I only faced the scale again last week and I was up 24 pounds - sigh!

I've recommitted to eating the way my body needs in order to be healthy. I've noticed a HUGE difference in my depression since giving up the sugar and carbs in just a week's time.

We can do this! I just want to thank you again for sharing your ups and downs. It helps to know I'm not alone:)

Well, I shoot it and then just size it down be around 600 pixels wide, but starting out at a high resolution from my camera. No sharpening though. Although I did run a skin smoother on my face! ha!

PURPLE LEVEL! DUDE! : ) Thats awesome, Tammy. I think I just assumed youd always been a runner. I think the challenges are coming back. They did say late fall. So, Ill be watching that. : ) Thanks for your post today. Made me smile.

Kristi, I love that you always remind me about Cropper Hopper. Youre so cute. : ) And yes, poor choices are what have been happening here too. I do believe so much of it is what we put in our bodies, not just the endless cardio workouts. Sigh. You arent alone. im not alone. For many of us, this is a challenge that is just part of life.

http://whole9life.com/2012/08/the-whole30-program/


Were going to give it a whirl in my class! : )

Quitting smoking is so hard. I tried about 6 times before it actually stuck. : )

Ive taken BodyPump, but I didnt keep it up. Strength is a hard one for me, because Im a bit of a weakling. Working on that.

You might feel puffy today, but you are totally rockin' the lip gloss! That color is awesome on you. :)

One day at a time in the journey of being healthy. I think I am a year older then you are and I totally get where you are with this. Keep plugging away.

Have a great, postive and healthy kind of day.

Body pump is where I started, and I loved it. Just make sure your form is good, many instructors don't correct form in that class and I picked up some bad habits. Other instructors do a great job at correcting. It is a great cardio workout with the strength element. The number of reps you do keeps the weight low enough that you can start to build strength that way.
I really noticed a difference once I built up to being able to use the barbell and plates. (higher weights, lower reps) Body pump still kicks my butt now because of all the reps...
Variety is the spice of life!

THANK YOU for being so freakingly completly honest! I so needed to read this because...well...I'm diabetic and I KNOW what I need to be doing.

Knowing and doing...ehhh not the same thing.

This morning...I DID wake up with the committment, to myself, to try again. To try and live healthy. Try and live with enjoyment. And to try to just TRY... And tomorrow...I will wake up with the committments to myself...AND the day after that, I will make the same committement. AND and so on and so on and so on.

I finally gave up the butts this past May and I havn't looked back. Almost 6 months and counting! I told myself from the get go that I would start walking after work. My dog is ridiculously happy about our 2 miles each evening - but it is not helping the growing spare tire around my waist! May have to change the walk into a jog - heaven help me. Thank you for all the inspiration!

Nope...in fact other than starting a cardio video program the previous year I was not the least bit athletic. However I had platued on that program and was quite discouraged....you were the one that motivated me to start running...I figured if she could do it, why couldn't I?!?! I'll be watching for those challenges too. Have a great day!!

Hmmmmmm I'm not sure about doing this because I'm vegetarian and get a lot of my protein from beans (and it says to give them up). What do you think???

GO KIM! I know its a big deal. Just stay the course, woman! : )

Thats a hard one, I have no ideas for you. My daughter is also a vegetarian and wants to do it, but I told her: I dont know what you would eat. And she doesnt even like beans. Sigh. : )

I'm just wondering if doing WW helped you to slim down to a weight you liked why you are still not on the program? I'm just curious. I am in the trenches with you. I have 68 pounds to lose and I am only down 9 in seven weeks. I feel like I am working harder than the results I am getting. Working out daily and being food conscious. I have considered many different diets I just have not committed to one. I'll be looking into Whole 30. Thanks for sharing your journey.

so funny that you said "hells bells" because i am listening to jim butcher right now...i don't know if you got it from the dresden files or if you just already say that, but the main character in those books says it a lot :)

Stephanie, I did do WW, and lost weight, but I was not able to maintain the low fat lifestyle, and now, Im much more interested in eating whole foods, non-processed, kinds of things. Now, that doesnt mean Ive been doing that. No, Ive been eating junk for the past few months with some real consistency. For me, WW was a way to slim down and not a way that I could sustain.

I think I grew up saying that and have no idea why! ha!

Cathy,

It feels like magic (once you get past the first week, when it feels like anything but). Just cut the refined/processed sugar. That's all you need to do. You will be amazed at how good you feel; how elivated your mood is; how much more energy you have.

I have struggled with depression my whole life - and it wasn't until removing refined sugar and processed carbs from my diet that I realized what "normal" felt like. It's literally been like a miracle for me.

That's not to say that I don't have a glass of wine occasionally... or if I'm at someone's house, of course I will eat what they serve... but I limit it and plan for it.

I love that you are going to try this - and if you need any encouragement or coaching, I am totally here for you. You CAN do this. I read somewhere that sugar is as addictive as cocaine. And I believe it. Hang in there... YOU can do it!

I had to tell you that as I scrolled through this post I couldn't help but notice the change in you but the change I saw was not what you seemed to mention. You look gorgeous in your second photo, your eyes are sparkling, your smiling, you look like a women in love. I personally think the second photo of you is better, and that you are a better you in that photo, for things that are way more important than your pant size.

You may feel puffy, but you really don't look it. You look happy and healthy. Love the hair!

I'm battling my own sugar addiction and have been instructed to cut down on bread and rice. It's only day 2. 0_0

I totally could have written this post. I dropped way down after my girl was born, but it quickly crept back on and I've been stuck there. For three effing years. My head has just not been in the game, and I know it. But here I am, dragging my butt out of bed at 5 am again. Focusing on 3 days a week. Knowing if I do that for a month I can up it to 4. Then 5. And the SUGAR. Seriously it's like crack. One teensie weensie bite and I'm off the wagon and suffering cravings. *sigh* Off to not slobber all over my kids cookies. :)

(Pssst - another hells bells devotee over here too. And stars and stones.)

: ) Thank you.

I really enjoyed this sharing! It is something I have gone through so many times...losing it...gaining it..and the circle continues. Your reminder has given me the impetus to go at it again.

I have a request of you....please back of the crude language when you write. It seems we are constantly surrounded by it in this society and it is not pleasant to listen to, so I sincerely ask you don't be part of it.

Again thanks for sharing!

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