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November 26, 2012

Chubby Hubby

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This is not going to be a post about Ben & Jerry's ice cream.

Nor will it be about my decidedly non-chubby hubby Dan.

And while there is a link between them, this is really—surprise, surprise—all about me.

Many of you know I've been trying Move More and Eat Well for coming up on three years. 

You know because you've read about the ups, the downs and the many in-betweens of this little health quest of mine over the past 36 months. (And if you've been reading me even longer, many more whines have been posted along the way.) And you've shared a lot of your own very personal stories in the comments over these past many months.

This is not a whine post today. It, like some of my State of the Marriage posts, is hopefully about the truth.

So are you ready for it? The truth? It's not going to come as some big hoo ha, but here it is:

This s#@t is hard for me.

I feel like the lyrics from a ZZ Top song…I been up, I been down… (and for you ZZ Top fans, maybe I am, in fact, looking for some 'tush'—looking for some, ahem, smaller tushand specifically the size of my own.)

Let me back up with a quick short story about 2012.

On January 1, I weighed 160 pounds. Then I gained 10 pounds in 11 months. The end.

Okay, there's actually more because what you need to know is that I started 2012 up 19 pounds from the sacred low of October 2010.

I'll do the math here: of the 40 I lost back in 2010, 29 are back.

Just so you know, one of the purposes of moving more and eating well is to have a scale that measures a smaller number, or at the very least, one that stays the same.

That said, if there's one thing I've finally connected to this year it's that it's not just about a number on the scale.

So here are the facts:

• At 170 pounds, I'm physically in the best cardiovascular shape of my life, more or less. I can run 3 miles without passing out; I can swim 30 minutes nonstop and am in no danger of drowning.

• My connection to exercise and better mental health has never been stronger. I can attest to this because as I've slacked off on exercise this fall, I've felt far more life stress than at any time in the past three years.

• My attitude remains one of "I can actually do this thing" as opposed to "Oh HADES! Pass me the Sprite and Cheez-Its!"

 

Here's some more truth: my therapist, who I believe has helped me not only save my marriage but also has helped to save me in pretty much every way possible layed this on me: why would I want to solve my weight problem? I thrive on having a problem. When I keep it a problem, it means I get to keep acting like the child I've been all these years. Acting like a child = indulge myself by eating all manner of foods that really don't fall into the Eating Well category.

Ouch.

But if she wasn't delivering some truth there, it wouldn't hurt to hear it, now would it?

I know there are those of you for whom this is a no-brainer process. And you may sit back and say, "Jeez Zielske, figure it out!" 

I assure you, I'm trying to figure it out. Every day is an opportunity to do better. To move more. To eat well. To care for this veritable temple of a body that I am so fortunate to have.

But back to the chubby hubby connection. Here's another story:

When Dan went to Slovenia last Spring, we realized in those 11 days apart that this whole thing we've got going? It's a good thing. It led to six months of food and wine and fun. I was completely plugged into experiencing life—still am, mind you—but it also included a lack of sound judgment as far as quantities and calories have gone.

The fact is that Dan and I don't share metabolic similarities. I can't go mental with food unless I'm running hours every week. And with a nagging foot injury that I'm presently dealing with, that's just not possible.

I love my hubby. I let myself get chubby. 

Now it's time to focus. 

I'm not pretending that somehow I magically gained weight with zero understanding of how it happened.

 

My Move More, Eat Well students know my story this year very well. I don't try to present them with the idea that HEY! Look at me! I have it all goin' on!

They, like me, are works in progress. God love 'em.

I am continuing on with the journey and I'm also going to run Move More, Eat Well 2.0 in 2013

And just because it's almost December doesn't mean I'm going to wait until January 1 to get serious. 

Heck no. Today's as good as day as any, right?

What about you? Where are you at as the year begins to wind down and what are your plans for 2013 as far as taking care of you go?

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For a short audio message about Move More, Eat Well 2.0, click here.

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Comments

Glad you're doing MMEW in 2013. I slipped up in 2012 with this goal (again) and would welcome the chance to keep going. I'ver lost a little in the last few months and want to keep up the momentum so I'm pleased as punch that this is back. Glad to hear you're feeling in a better state about it too. Pxx

Well I'm with you although I haven't been on the scale to see how much of the 35 pounds is back but its a lot.
Anyway thought you may like to see this if you haven't. I'm going to try and motivate myself with this for next 21 days. To at least have some control over the holidays!

It is a daily battle...choosing wisely! Ugh!! I do pretty good with the exercising because I (gasp!) actually like sweating and working out but eating healthy does not come easy. I just keep trying and hope that some healthier choices stick! Keep up the daily fight!! :)

You could definitely see your enthusiasm in the work you write. The world hopes for more passionate writers like you who aren't afraid to say how they believe. Always follow your heart.

You've got this one, my friend. You've got it. YOU. CAN. DO. THIS. Here's to committing to one decision at a time. Today. I'm right there with you... seriously - you may not realize it, but you have a twin separated at birth (and a very long, multiple year labor!) in Illinois! :-) I am right there with you.

I am with with you! However, I will start in January. I too have gained a solid 30#. YIKES! I have some really good excuses, estrogen inhibitors (Bam! A solid #22 pounds in less than 2 months!), followed by a skiing accident that led to surgery and no running for 6 months, the stress of my last semester of nursing school, and whatever else I deem important. But, at the end of the day I have gained a craptastic amount of weight that I will lose. That I want to lose, but I am not going to stress about it until January. I have accepted this and am looking forward to it. I wish each and everyone of you the best as you strive for the best you starting today. It would be just another stressful, feel bad about yourself, put down the wine glass and cheese pretzels stressor for me.

Ah the challenges of adulthood! Thanks for always keeping it real Cathy.

I've learned that with both a knee and a heel injury this year, I have to cut out the amount that's going into my mouth since I can't move more, much less even normally now. It doesn't seem fair but it is what is. Sometimes the chocolate wins out when I need to sweeten this 'unfairness' but more often I can think the food through. Not always. Sometimes the little girl wins out too in my house. Sigh...

I've hemmed and hawed about writing this for the past 20 minutes. You and I have 'dished' about all this food stuff before (Paleo anyone?), but I'm gonna drop one on you.

Maybe it's time to move on from MMEW. Hell, I'm closing in on 48 soon, I can't run the 8 miles a day that I used to becuase things ache if I do, and I can't move my body after 7:00 p.m. when I use that much energy.

I understand the weight creep thing, but for me, and I stress that I am talking from MY point of view (translate: I'm not saying this as a judgement), I've decided to move on. I am not going to stay a certain weight, size, look, blah, blah, as I move toward 50. And you know what? When I let that go, when I stopped beating myself up about it, when I stopped lamenting all the things I couldn't eat, or do, or have, because of my weight / perceived 'goal' mark, I became me again.

I started enjoying people who don't seem obsessed (or frankly, even interested many times) with their outward appearance. I started hearing people's stories about their lives - things that involved their health / weight, but more importantly, things that involved their hearts and souls. I started enjoying down time with my soon-to-be-leaving-the-nest teenagers. I play more cribbage with my son. I watch more teen TV with my daughter. I simply sit at the kitchen island and hang out, and you know what? My teens, my hubby, and my friends seem to find me. They seem to stop, sit, talk, laugh, cry, eat, drink, whatever.

I think staying on the move and eating right (but without all these crazy rules and extremes) are the absolute best things a person can do. Hands down. No question. BUT, for me, taking the time and energy I used to put into researching about which diet, trying to figure outwhat type of exercise, running for hours on the treadmill or in the park, and instead, splitting that time in half, has been the answer. I'm still taking care of the ole ticker, but with less angst and more awareness of the end goal: reduce stress, maintain strong heart / lungs / joints, and enjoy the amazing world of beauty and people around me...

My change of heart came when I realized that I had to bust my keister twice as long, for half the results, all the while denying myself little moments of enjoyment (i.e. a small treat), all to reach some unatainable goal that only I had set for myself.

The truth came out when my family and friends noticed how much more 'engaged' I was with them. And the biggest prize came when I was able to just accept myself as I am.

Is it a daily process? Certainly. Do I struggle with self-doubt and insecurity? Heck yes. But now, I can refocus my thoughts (and my time!) on things that really matter - people, giving of myself in big and small ways, and really, REALLY embracing the incredible gifts I have been given.

I guess, for me, 2013 will be about moving on...

Where I'm at: I'm 40 pounds heavier than I should be and I just gained 5 pounds over Thanksgiving. My bad knee and bad back would both benefit greatly from having less weight on my frame.

After listening to your audio message, I am inspired to join you in 2013. And like you said in your blog post, I don't want to wait until 2013 to start. I can't afford to! Today I'm going to throw out the leftover chocolate pie and mashed potatoes. And I will make myself take a walk. (Hey, maybe you should start a podcast so we can all listen while we exercise!) Thanks for the inspiration and good luck in your efforts.

I'm with you in 2013. And you are right this sh*@t is HARD and has been for a lifetime for me. But I am committed to making 2013 my year. Thanks for getting us all going!

Wow. Now THAT is some good food for thought, Mary. I definitely connect to being more in the moment with my family; less on the extreme focus of diets etc. Thats kind of where Im at and I want to make THAT lifestyle make me less chubby. It hasnt quite worked that way yet. ; ) But yeah, where is the balance is what I want to know. At 47, my life, lets face it, is probably more than half over. I just want to be healthy and live long and not be an obsessive person. Yet, be fit and healthy at the same time. Loved reading what you wrote. Im glad you DID write it. Thanks, Mary.

that's what I love about your blog, Cathy. You are authentic, genuine, and you make people like me think about our lives. Your MMEW project is what made me take stock of my situation. You are changing lives, Ms. Z!

Not to mention you are so freaking talented.

I was recently diagnoised with osteopenea as a result of too much prednisone used to treat asthma in my younger years. Although this does not affect my everyday life now since I'm only 50, it does represent an increase in the probability of a broken hip as I age. The doctor suggested that I start on boniva but I'm done with meds for now. Instead I'm going to adjust my diet and use that gym membership that we pay for every month and committ to becoming stronger. I know I will naturally shed some weight but I'm not going to make that the focus of my goal. My health will come first then my jean size. My mom use to tell my dad he was like an old car--never knew when he was going to breakdown. He didn't take his health seriously enough when he had the opportunity and his body broke down often. For me, it's going to be all about "no used car lots" in this temple people!!!

Happy ho,ho, ho to everyone!

Oh, Cathy, I just love you. As I approach 40, I find myself more and more content with myself. Not in a "I give up, where are the milk duds?" kind of way, but more in a "I want to keep it all in balance" kind of way. It's SO HARD to stay consistent. I find I'm one month on and two months off...then the week of guilt/beating myself up till I'm back on again.

It's good to know I'm not alone. Cheers to you! You don't look a bit chubby to me! :)

"why would I want to solve my weight problem? I thrive on having a problem. When I keep it a problem, it means I get to keep acting like ....."

Cathy I have been chewing on and spitting out this one sentence for many minutes. UMMM. Please thank your therapist for that zinger of free advice. Hit the root cause. Having a problem, is having a solution to offer, I love to fix things, make things better for everyone. No problem, no point in being - right?

I will be digesting this therapeutic cookie for a lot longer than this blog sharing time. UMMMMMM

Mary you are a very wise woman. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I too have been feeling that "why does my body not response as quickly or as well to my huge diet & exercise efforts?" Ah I have gotten older, the forbidden acceptance.

You know, I dont need to be the thinnest person around. I just want to be fit, and live and enjoy my life. But be healthy, too! I want to be around for a good long while and Ive spent a lot of years abusing this body of mine. Thats my focus for today and beyond: take care of me. : )

PLEASE know, you are NOT ALONE...this is the story of my life...your post could have been written by me...it could be worse...I could have cancer or be away from my family so a few extra pounds is nothing considering the alternatives...chin up...I am with you!

I'm definitely with you in 2013! I wasn't ready in 2012 but I started WW in September and I'm down 24 lbs. (WW is teasing a new, revamped program with details to follow next week.) Then I got your BPC email and decided "Lucky 13--go for lean!" Or maybe, "Lucky 13--fit in those jeans" or "Lucky 13--less of me to be seen." I could do this all day! I am turning 49 in January and you're right, this s#@t IS hard but not impossible and so worth it!

Ah I am there with you! I just knew that MMEW was going to be just the ticket for me. I want to be healthier and get a handle on my weight while doing something I love (scrapbooking). I truly thought this is going to be a cinch! Yeah right. Not so much. At 47 I am dealing with degenerative arthritis in both my knees and I have found moving to be excruciatingly painful at times. Doctors don't want to do knee replacement because I am too young yet for that. Can it ever get easier? I sometimes get so exasperated! My plan is to start over again with MMEW in 2013. I also plan on doing Whole 30 starting January 1. I am really trying to learn how food affects my body in all ways. (not just weight) I have been trying to eat cleaner with no processed foods. I have had a history of migraines since I was about 20 years old. Cutting out a lot of the processed junk I have not had a migraine since August 1st. That is huge and enough to keep me striving to eat healthier. Move More and Eat Well will be my mantra for 2013! Happy Holidays!

This is a greatpost Cathy. I actually have lost 18 pounds this last few months and have even made a page with 3 pictures of me in the mirror like you did for awhile. Love your Therapist said. May have to add that to a quote I heard about self control that I have staring at me in my office. But there is a balance and that balance for some of us is hard to attain. For me it is always social eating that gives me fits and tis the season for social gatherings....

I've been continually impressed with your commitment to exercise. I'm pretty sure I couldn't run three miles or swim for 30 minutes at this point!!

I'm one of your MMEW students, although I've been pretty much AWOL. Signing up for the class was a sign of a commitment I needed to make. Since last December, I've lost between 25 and 30 pounds. I'm now "only" overweight and not obese. (I began having trouble with acid reflux and realized I needed to make some changes.) I played a little on the Wii Fit Plus yesterday and realized how awesome it is to not be carrying around those pounds. I am really jazzed right now. I've been eating better, but not really exercising much. Now I'm motivated to commit to making time for that. I don't always feel this way, but I'm going to ride the wave, baby!

In 2011, I was inspired by your photo-journal of weight loss and I lost 25 pounds - yay me. In 2012, I gained all of it back! I won't go into all the drama but a lot of life changes going on AND hormones plus sugar addiction added up to junk food gorging. I gave up the ice cream 2 weeks ago, diet soda last week and I have to get move more now to make all of it work again.

My goal is to feel better, look better and move easier at 48 than I have at 47.

I'll be back in 2013. It keeps me focused. And I'll be back with Paleo again too. Why? because I know that I'll be burning fat & not carbs & eating real food (which I wasn't any more with WW). I also know with Paleo I need to move heavy stuff, walk & occasionally sprint instead of constant cardio that I don't have time for. I know my "numbers" were the best ever while I followed it. It won't "solve" any problems, but it will keep me healthier. And I will digress from time to time because this is a journey not an end.

Way to go, Laura! And Wii Fit is pretty awesome! I think i should load mine up this winter!

Hi Cathy -
Congratulations on your terrific cardiovascular and respiratory health!
Congratulations on having an engaged and happy marriage!
Congratulations on having two smart, happy and healthy kids!
- Lee

P.S. Yeah, I didn't mention the weight. I chose the three most important things.

I'll be back in 2013 too and right there with you. I've had 4 months of knee issues and haven't been able to walk. But I think it is now on the mend. Plus, I've lost 20 pounds this past year and do not want to put them back on. I still need the month by month encouragement that someone else understands my struggles and I just want to keep feeling better and better.

I am one of your MMEW students this year, and I am going to carry on with you in 2013 as well. I have followed your posts and your video boosts, and have very much appreciated them. I haven't posted much in the way of the message boards. I even forgot about the scrapbooking portion of the class, but that is okay. For me it was the message and the striving to do better for my health that was more important.

I have been in a rut/plateau all year. I only recently broke through it, I sure because I kept plugging away at it. I have only lost 10 pounds of the 100+ that I need to be in a healthy range. I am not stressed about it. It is a start. I plan on continuing.

I wanted to let you know that I understand how hard it is. I know that it needs work, and that it will be a lifetime struggle. I am grateful to you and your class, because it has given me focus. I am prepared and willing to continue this for my lifetime. I don't need to be the thinnest, but I do want to be healthy for the time that I have left on this Earth.

Thank you, Cathy, for sharing this time of learning with us.
Jennifer

Love that. Thank you.

Okay, seriously -- is your therapist taking new clients?!? That is the kind of thing that I don't want to hear but is exactly true (except for me, it's about buying things).

I'll be joining you for MMEW for the first time next year and am really excited for the push. I'm right in my happy weight range but have been eating poorly and slacking on exercise lately and I need this to help me choose health daily.

I think for me I hate that I am always "starting again". When I start to think of it
I go crazy. I never seem to arrive. A few months ago I completed the Insanity work out
series. I lost ten pounds and felt so fit and strong. A few weeks after the program ended
I was not working out. I really felt like this was the time I would stay consistent.
Anyway the MMEW is always a struggle, I'm just trying to be nice to myself and just start
back and do what I can. You never feel bad after a workout or a day of healthy eating.
Also on the hubby front my man weighs the same as the day we got married. So I relate to the fact that we can go out for BBQ and a Guinness but I will be the one who pack on the pounds even though we had fun. Always a work in progress.

LOL!! You are one of my favorite people ever! =)

I totally hear ya on the acting like a child thing...I read once that if there is a significant trauma in our childhood, we tend to remain at that emotional age the rest of our lives. Major changes in my life including a major heart attack for my Dad and a cross-country move occurred in my childhood around 6th grade. Only recently did I realize that behaving like a 12 yr old little girl does not yield positive results when you're, say, a 42 year old woman. Who knew?

Keep keeping it real. I LOVE that about your blog! And shame on Dan for having decent metabolism...where does he get off? LOL!

I love that Mary is finding (and accepting!) the way that feels best for her - and I am glad that you are experimenting with what works best for you, Cathy! It's such an individual process.

For me, at 53, I've got a bunch of years on you both - so I am a bit slow to the party - but am finding that food, more than anything else in my life - is a key contributor to how I feel. I'm realizing (through lots of experimentation and trial and error) what works for me and what doesn't.

For me, Paleo works. I don't know if it's food sensitivities or allergies or what - but I feel a million percent better eating lots of protein, low glycemic fruits and veggies (concentrating on those that are most nutrient-dense), and eliminating dairy, gluten and other grains.

Is it hard sometimes? Yes. But here's the thing - for me, it's easier than the alternative of feeling bloated, moody, depressed and lethargic.

Are there times when I'm not 100% clean in my eating? Yes. But they are the exception (e.g., if I'm going to someone's house for dinner, I am not about to make my eating choices enter into the evening at all... I eat what they make - and am so thankful for the friendship that is underlying it!).

And give up the occasional glass of red wine? Over my cold, dead body.

All in all... it works for me. That doesn't make it easy all the time - but it does get easier. The cravings subside. The energy levels increase. And I just feel better.

As I look at the year ahead, the one thing that I want to concentrate on most is self-care. For me, what I put into my body is a very important part of that self-care. It's as important as getting enough exercise, being with friends who nurture and support me, and participating in creative endeavors (like Project Life!) that fuel my soul.

I realize it's not that way for everyone - and that's totally good. I have just finally gotten to the place where I see food as a way to nurture myself, rather than punish myself. It's all a shift in mindset that for me has been so freeing.

xo to you both!

Lynne

Loved reading this Lynne. And i know there is science behind Paleo and how our bodies process (or dont) foods that honestly are just a part of the agricultural revolution and really arent designed to work with the human body! : ) Good for you! It is very individual as you say. I know I feel better all around when I eat well. When theres too much sugar, my joints dont like it at all. : )

Those damn hormones! Right there with you, girl!!

Totally love your honesty. And everyone who has posted each have some wonderful and inspirational things to say. We all have our journeys. I just wanted to bring mine to your attention, if it is ever something you'd be interested in trying.

After battling the bulge for many many years, and after years of abusing my body, I found a way of life that has changed my perspective on myself and life around me.

CrossFit.

CrossFit has given me so much more than physical strength. My mentality went from uncertainty and disbelief in myself to acceptance and confidence. I'm talkin' leaps and bounds here. No joke. And I can't even explain what is has done for my family. We CrossFit together! Yes, the kids love it too! It's all about family... because CrossFit IS a family!
You never get bored, you accomplish things you would otherwise think were near impossible. You are constantly growing and evolving. You are always supported. You are always reaching new goals. Stalemate is void.

I challenge you, Cathy Zielske, to just TRY it... at least you can check it off your bucket list. It's a ton of fun! And there's probably a CrossFit box (gym) near you. Take Dan... it's something you can do together. ;-)

Such an open and honest post, as always. I admire you Mrs. Z and thanks for keeping it real. Happy that you are getting better mentally and in your relationship. To infinity and beyond!!
PS: I adore your writing style!!!

I have heard amazing things about CrossFit. One of my very good friends does this, and I know it is something Dan and I could do together. There is a CrossFit gym about four miles from my house. Maybe its time...

Ah, mental health (as related to exercise improving it). I've been thinking about that one lately. I've been trying to get back to a state of mind I had almost four years ago after my 2nd son was born. I've tried to recreate my life to match what it was then - including quitting my job so I could be a full-time stay-at-home mom because I was so much less stressed then. It didn't work. I've been more stressed out (to the point of a recurrence of chronic hives). I have no patience for my children. I am not the carefree non-working person I imagined I would be. But... there is one thing I haven't bothered to recreate from that dreamy time in my life... I was exercising at least 3 days/week back then. Hmm... could that be the missing puzzle piece? I'm thinking maybe. Thanks for the virtual kick in the butt! ;)

My fellow weight loss sister, I so feel ya! I lost 40 lbs back in 2003 and now most of that weight has crept back (gained 30 total). :(

It will be a struggle for all of us all our lives and once we realize this, I hear it gets a bit easier (although I don't believe it).

You can do it & so can I! :)

I love your posts about this. It took me a year to lose 30 pounds and I felt so good! Healthy and good. And happy. I maintained for about a year. Then in the span of 13 months I had basically the top three life changes that cause the most stress and went on a bear cave pity party and couch potato-ed it back. Those clothes I was wearing and swearing I was definitely going to remain in are tight. I can think of a million and one excuses for not getting my act together but sharing your story and the quote from your therapist about "when I keep a problem it means I get to keep behaving like the child I've been all these years." really struck a chord. I'm 44. My dad passed away in March at the age of 81 and my mom is 80. Hopefully I have a lot of life left and I want the body I had 30 pounds ago. It totally sucks to think how hard I will have to work the next 40 years to be healthy but to choose not to is to have headaches, sore joints, bat wing arms and a behind you can balance a glass on. I can't go there. I will be thinking a while on choosing to grow up-- before the glass balancing happens. ;-) Thanks for sharing.

Your posts always hit home and resonate with me! Your honest, well written, humorous blogs filled with great scrapbooking ideas make your blog my favorite!! Huge thanks (there's a bunch of us following along with you).

Dang girl. Thank you for sharing your therapist thoughts! I think I can borrow that thought and maybe, just maybe the light is shining alittle brighter. Maybe I LIKE having this losing weight project. OMG - Crazy thought but just might be an answer.
WOW!
I'm simply gum smacked and annoyed at myself at the same time. haha

Again thanks for sharing. You always teach me a little something.
peace out!
Julie

Just what I needed to see today! I've lost 40 pounds since March but my goal originally was just to be healthier. Eat healthier, be more active. I've stopped focusing on the healthy and more on the number and I'm losing my way (again!) I really need to lose another 25 but that means getting back on track and no more mindless eating (like tonight's feast on M&Ms). I'd love to see more recipes that you have found! Thanks for being such an HONEST inspiration, sometimes the internet is so full of fake perfectness that it's depressing. I love how open and honest you are, keep it up!

http://ltbs-ang11rock.blogspot.com/2012/11/buying-rice-in-tea-store.html

We are all on the same journey. Your willingness to share your stories is an inspiration and a blessing. I just came across a story about "phantom waiting rooms" where we figuratively wait for something we claim to want, but will never get if we keep waiting where we are. It's like going to a furniture store hoping to get ice cream, or a tea store hoping to get rice. I've included a link to my blog post on this topic. Your courage to be vulnerable and share is truly a gift to me and many others. Thank you.

Thanks for the great post. I'm so lucky to "know" you!

Lee above said it well, and I will repeat in my own words. You look so happy and confident; you are enjoying your spouse and your kids are fun and you like them. Wow! What an accomplishment.

I have a husband who can't gain a pound to save his life. He thinks that I am beautiful, regardless of what I weight...and he always asks me why women care so much. I'm trying hard to focus on being healthy and not on the weight but, it's still hard!

Thanks for the honest share, looking forward to 2.0.

Yes! Yes! Yes!

I just started cross fit and I love it. I have told Cathy before the benefits of heavy weights... Cross fit is so fun and right up my alley.

I do that once a week, lift on my own once a week, do another class one day and walk and bike in between.

The other part is nutrition. Paleo/primal works for me. And making sure I get enough to eat.

I was talking to a friend about a blog post I wrote awhile ago(http://amysorensen.typepad.com/the_english_geek/2012/11/just-call-me-elaine.html) and how just losing the weight is the easiest part. It's the maintaining that's hard, and for me that has required dealing with other issues so that I don't turn to an entire bag of Hershey's kisses for comfort.

The thing that struck me most about your post is that you understand your food relationship...that you've maybe put on a few pounds but it's because you've been enjoying life & indulgences a little bit more, not because you couldn't deal. (I hope that makes sense!) To me that's the entire point, understanding why we do what we do and being in charge of the process (even if "being in charge" means savoring and indulging for awhile), and so long as we just keep trying to figure it out then we will be OK.

I don't always comment but I always love your Move More, Eat Less posts! The comments are always great, too!

There is a gym less than four miles from my house.... hmmm. Im assuming theyre good with people who are dealing with some injury stuff?

Well I blew my knee this summer running and doing too much too fast with weights. And they are working with me so I don't reinjure. They should have a beginner or intro program to teach form etc and ease you into it. In addtion they probably have some kind of free intro or something too. As a rule all the workouts can be scaled to ability and fitness level. It's functional strength kind of stuff....and it's always different. Last night I did a workout that involved pull ups...I just can't do them. I even had a resistance band and still wasn't doing well. The trainer/owner added a second band...then I did fine...gotta do pull up motion to get better at pull ups...plus I was getting mad and down on myself. It's generally a very positive environment and focused on individual performance. It's also motivating me to get more creative in my solo workouts. I could easily get addicted to it.

Thanks, Amy. I will save your post to read later today! : ) Thanks for sharing!

there is a great op ed in the nyt today about a mean letter written by a parent to his children. a therapist took issue saying that it's critical to find the strands of good things and emphasize those. the berating of kids or oneself doesn't work.

you are so tenacious with this and i applaud you and am inspired by you. i have always had the weight come back too. i think our bodies want to be at the highest weight.

thanks for sharing your journey.

I am in love with this post. Thanks for sharing. I had lost 60 lbs two years ago and this summer I just shut down. I have re gained 26 pounds as of Monday. Wow, it just made me sick to write that. I started exercising again on Friday...yup, the day after Thanksgiving. I was feeling 'start now.' I am really out of shape, but hopeful and my head is in a better place. Thanks fro letting me see that I am not the only one.

I am happy for you finding joy in your marriage. An inspiring addition to your blog. Marriage counseling is hard!

your honesty is always so refreshing! you are living the same middle-aged, mom, wife, woman life that so many of us are! life is messy and hard and wonderful and warm all at the same time. unfortunately the older we get the more work it takes to maintain our fitness but i love what mary says about how we are going to spend our time. twice as much exercise and half as much time with the people that matter or the same amount of exercise and a smile on our heart and on those around us? keep moving girl...it keeps you mentally sane...just don't beat yourself up over the results and above all remember that those people under your roof love you to pieces whether you weigh 170 or 140!

God I love you. We need to talk.

Thanks, Stacie. : )

I predict it will happen eventually. In person.

Absolutely they're good with injury. The awesome thing is, you always have a trainer on hand. All workouts can be scaled (think boy push ups scaled down to girl push ups, scaled down to wall push ups). And the really wonderful thing (in regards to injury) is that CrossFit spends a lot of time on mobility, keeping things warmed up and loosened up. They place a ton of importance on mobility. I'm tellin' ya, it's the coolest thing ever. Functional and fun. Super addicting, like heroin (except you get to keep your teeth, lol).
Here's a few videos to better help explain...
http://youtu.be/mlVrkiCoKkg
http://youtu.be/NoFlNa6B9fo

You can do this Cathy! I know you can!

Hey Cathy.... is there a discount code for people who signed up for the 2012 class and then threw themselves SO FAR off track they were too embarrassed to even open any of the class files past the pre-class files? Gulp. Yep, that's me.
Humbly Yours,
Kristi
(yeah, yeah, who used to work at Cropper Hopper)
:)

Kristi, you crack me up! You know, Im really actually there with you! You should jump in for 2013. Document it. I am going to really focus on doing the pages, even when I feel like I dont want to see the truth staring me in the face! : )

You get to keep your teeth... made me smile.

Hey, Kristi, almost me too. I looked at a couple things, but the Guilt pretty much kept me out of class the rest of the year.

Like you, Cathy, I cannot wait till January to begin taking better care of me. (My husband said if I treated him the way I take care of myself, he would have left me long ago. Yikes.) I am only a few pounds from the brink of crossing upwards into the I NEVER EVER WANT TO WEIGH THAT MUCH numbers. I refuse to let that happen. And this is not about a "number" so much as it's about feeling uncomfortable all the time, physically. I need to lighten up, literally. I will feel so much better. So I began to watch over myself 48 hours ago, and already I can feel more peace slipping into my mind. This is a good thing, not a deprivation. I'm going to try concentrating on what I CAN do and what I can eat and enjoy, not on what I "can't." Or rather, on what I am choosing to forego. :)

Oh Cathy! I hear ya! I have been on this struggle too. Here is what I would share. Keep your mind mindful of what you are doing & how you are doing it. Park a few spaces away when you go shopping. Enjoy the food & wine when you are out with your husband. You are working at keeping your relationship alive & you should enjoy that time. Eat better for your other meals so that you can fully enjoy that time with him. I have a friend who has logged a note weekly on Facebook about her progress & it kept her in-line with what she should be doing. I just started doing the same & it is so nice to hear the comments from friends encouraging me to make smart choices. I just enjoyed our Thanksgiving & still lost my goal of 1 pound a week...even without exercising (got a darn cold & can't breath!!!). Little by little. Smart choices. Add a few exercises when you can. You look good.

Thanks for the ideas, Julie. Its all about balance. : )

I've been on Weight Watchers for 3 years; I've decided to quit on January 1. I've lost 70 pounds at my best, and I'm gone up and down 3 pounds here and there since initially hitting that mark. I've accepted that this is probably as far as I'll go with actually losing weight; this seems to be the right balance for me. Am I super skinny? Nope. But I'm healthier, and like you, I'm in the best shape I've been in for the past 15 years! I've accepted that food will be a daily challenge for me - FOREVER. If I want to enjoy the food and drink, then I have to work out, too. If I stick to that, I hope to stay pretty even going forward.

Good for you, Tracy. That sounds like a lot of work and a very good perspective. : )

I think you are beautiful. :) Just saying.

I appreciate that comment because I believe you.

Oh Cathy I totally understand the "chubby hubby". My husband and I are both like that, when we're together we like to chill out together a bit too much. He works in the Australian mining/construction industry so his roster can be 3 weeks away 1 week at home. When he's gone he eats well, works hard and comes home looking dang hot good. I get in a good routine, go to the gym chase after kids and don't eat as much. I end up "looking good". When he's home we just love to hang out in eachother's presence have too many snacks together and it doesn't take long for those lost kilos to find us again. He's off work for 3 months with a broken leg and we're starting to see the kilos hang around. We've had to start motivating eachother to move more. Thankfully I inherited my Mum's amazing motabalisim and it doesn't take long. Poor hubby is struggling to move with the bad leg, but he'll get there.

Well I cannot lie, I frickin' HATE HATE HATE that your scale doesn't reflect the positive things that your healthier lifestyle has given you. Goodness knows we all love to see those numbers go down. My scale and I aren't friends right now either. I trained for and conquered my first FULL marathon, because of YOU. YES YOU C-Dog!! It was because of your bloggy that I found out about Run Like A Mother... consequently I read Train Like A Mother and followed their Marathon Finish It Plan to a successful, healthy marathon finish last month at the Rock n Roll Savannah. THANK YOU!!!!!!
So why is my scale up? Apparently marathon training can add to some weight gain... who KNEW!?!?!!?! But I am one bad ass Mother Runner, and I can look that 150 lbs in the eye and tell it to fuck off.
Haha... there's something to be said for feeling healthy in our 40 year old bodies isn't there?
Love ya girl,
~Jamie in Savannah

Amen! : )

I'm a Grandma and when I was younger (birth to about 45) I was skinny and tall. Never mattered what I ate or did. Well....then I hit the middle 40s. It's just the way it is. Your body just changes shape. I am a little older now, retired and still feeling healthy. I take no meds (never have) and I walk 2-3 miles a day. I can do anything I did in my 40s, 50s....I just try to ignore the poochy tummy...hide it with clothes. I just try to ignore the face I see in the mirrow...hello mama! Feel good? Healthy? Happy family? It's all good!

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